Importance of Support
Certainly, I must overcome my own demons; how are others to overcome a dark force within someone else that they can’t even see? But help cannot come from within when I am being destroyed from within. My mind is trying to kill me, & I am fighting to survive until it changes its mind & decides to work with me rather than against me. Unfortunately, I cannot battle this alone.
In any guide about recovery from bipolar episodes & in any therapy session addressing the issue, the significance of having a solid, loving support group that is educated on the condition is overly emphasized. When my mind is not my own, I need stable minds to remind me of who I am & of my worth beyond the illness that plagues my mind. I need someone to remind me of what happiness & freedom & love look & feel like, &, truly, to remind me of why I should fight to live, why life is worth winning the battle. I need to be grounded in reality.
Repeatedly hearing that I have control of my perceptions & happiness, when in reality I don’t, utterly destroys me. It reinforces the self-loathing feeling of being rejected for what I truly am. It tells me that I am inadequate because of my disorders. It reminds me that I am alone because those closest to me have little understanding of my mental struggles; their minds are too healthy to fathom the darkness of my mind.
Without encouragement & validation from others, I will rapidly wither away. When I’m in a neutral state, I’m stable & have a solid, healthy self-esteem; but being neutral is a foreign concept at this point. I need support from people.